Friday, July 19, 2013

Holiday {photo - therapy}

'My kids don't need a Super mama. They need to see a mama who needs a Super God..' Ann Voskamp

I've been back at work for three days now.. The every day routine is reminding me very quickly just how life goes on.. Even though my weary heart still just feel like being alone and being left to mourn our little boy we will never be able to hold.. But life does not wait for the heartbroken, it does not stop for broken hearts to be mended and maybe in that there lies some grace, it's ruthless on the one side yet forces you to face life again and carry on maybe in ways you do not always like, but which is needed..

My perfectionist Jaydon gets seriously upset when our 'happy-go-lucky' - take life in his stride Ethan put his toys out of place or messes his juice where he (Jaydon) was suppose to walk or touches one of his toys with his messy hands after he ate his food walking up and down between doing something else and remembering to eat as well.. And it amazes me more and more every day to see how different they are, how God must have such a wonderful sense of humor to place so many different personalities in one household and yet we all just fit... Perfectly....

And this is what I'm learning more and more every day.. life is not perfect and I am no super mama, most days I'm tired and just making it through the day. But God provides for us every day. Just enough so we will make it through and other days so much our cups are overflowing, but always enough, we never need more than what He gives.. And that in itself is my daily piece of grace, and this mama is so grateful... Through all this I know God is holding my heart in His hand and in that alone I find my comfort.

“Too often we spend all of our time seeking God for answers to our problems when what we should be doing is just seeking God.”

This mama went away for five days with my boys.. It was a much needed break and even though we missed daddy very much (who had to stay home due to work demands), but we took granny and uncle Lew with which was so nice and just what we needed..

There is nothing like walking along the beach to clear your mind and soothe your soul, and give hope to healing heart...




We had the most wonderful weather and even though its the middle of winter we escaped some of the freezing weather at home and enjoyed the sun and the beach so much.. Even though the water was still too cold for swimming, the boys in their own ways enjoyed the beach very much (Jaydon after lots of coaxing and eventually distracting him with the beach pebbles and some sticks and stones lying around, and Ethan just loved the sand right from day 1 as always).. I still find it amazing how their personalities is so different and they are both such beautiful little boys.. One shy and serious, yet with such a wonderful sense of humor and the other loves being social and charming his way when meeting new people, yet so tender in his dealings...)












They had to go to the highest point on the dunes before Jaydon would consider standing on the beach sand on his own...


And eventually Jaydon loved it.. He gathered his pebbles and sticks and stones and forgot about the huge ocean and I just loved watching my boys being boys...



























































If Jaydon's shoe doesn't fit, I'll try my own...



























There was a pond right in front of our house and the kids had so much fun feeding the fish every morning...


















Our holiday was short, but just what I needed. Had a wonderful time with the boys. Lovely long walks on the beach with my mom and we just talked...
And a little more healing for my heart...

Life is not perfect..

I am not a super mama..

But God holds me in the palm of His hand, and right now - THAT is enough..




- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

2 comments:

  1. Photos are lovely.. But difficult not to be when your boys are in them :)

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    1. Thank you my friend... You inspire me to do so much more! xxx

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